Call of Duty: World at War

Today, I am going to review "Call of Duty: World at War" for the XBOX360. It is also for the Ps3, PC, and Wii.

Call of Duty: World at War is the fifth major Call of Duty game in the World War II franchise by Treyarch. Which, we can't even call it a World War II franchise now, as Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare brought us a, well, more modern look. I'm an XBOX man myself, and therefor most of the games I buy are for the XBOX. Based on the game (if it's bound to the PS3, or if all the people I know who are buying it are buying it for the PS3), I will decide which console suits it best.

The Premise:
Yes, I said "The Premise", as the plot is not... well there is no plot. The campaign comprises of you taking the role of (A.) A Russian soldier named Dimitri Petrenko, (B.) U.S. Private Miller, or (C.) For one mission, "Black Cats", you are Petty Officer Locke. How about I just finish this paragraph off, here's the storyline: "I'M IN A SQUADRON, GOING PLACES! KILL SHIT! GOT IT!" That's the storyline. "KILL SHIT!" That's the storyline. But the Multiplayer is the game, really. In fact...

Multiplayer -- Cons
Bullshit. That's a con! Shuttup! It has enough bullshit to just call it a con. It's got retarded respawn points and stupidly sized maps and retarded respawn points and horribly designed maps where it's super small and you can't NOT get spawnkilled. That run-on sentence + the double negative + the repeated statements wasn't as retarded as the content design of this game.

DOME (The Most Retarded Map Ever Used In Team Deathmatch)
SIZE: SMALL
VEHICLES: NO
SO DON'T FUCKING USE IT IN TEAM DEATHMATCH, FUCKTARD TREYARCH!

Multiplayer -- Pros
It's still fun, of course. Just a little anger inducing, that's all. The Flamethrower being included is a good plus, and the use of Dogs in multiplayer is definately an added plus for you, Treyarch. Not much to add to this, nothing really "Pro" worthy, because it's all the same as Call of Duty 4. Even without the modern guns, it's the same thing, really. Not much of a change. Still, fun!

Flame... Tank?

One more thing, still in the "Pro" section:

Nazis? No?

Zombies? No?

YOU MEAN!?!?!?

MOTHAFUCKIN' NAZI ZOMBIES!?!?!?

Overal Ranking:
Staff Captain. Lol.
*******---
Room for improvement, 7/10 stars, but a good game nonetheless.

Give us back Infinity Ward. Like. Now.

Resident Evil 5

Today, I am going to review "Resident Evil 5" for the PS3. It is also on XBOX360.

Resident Evil 5 is the newest game in the captivating zombie classic by CAPCOM. Although I have both XBOX360, and PS3, I decided to buy this one for the PS3. I have played both though, and I feel no difference.

The Plot:
You are Chris Redfield, a member of S.T.A.R.S. Your old partner, Jill Valentine, is gone, and you've met Sheva Alomar. Your mission is to locate a man in Africa who is known to be connected with terrorists who are using the parasite as a bioweapon. But that's not the end...

The Cons:
Another classic Resident Evil game. Did I say classic? I meant another, sorry, the first, resident evil game to be in, yup, THE DAYTIME. A zombie game... in the day? No. A "killing crazy black people with tentacles coming out of their head every now and then" game in the day. While this one wasn't as scary as it's predecessors, like Code Veronica, and Resident Evil 3 or 4, it is still a great game to kill shit. Another lacking area, is the reduced interactive cutscenes. You'll get a few here and there, but not like Resident Evil 4 where nearly EVERY action-oriented cutscene was interactive.

Quick Leon! Press X A Y B Y X LT LB X Y B!

And my final downside thought was the lack of puzzles and "cornered in a room with 500 zombies outside" moments. Still, a few, but not as I remember. Too bad the original Resident Evil guy left. Now they have to try. With that guy it was just "OK, make a Resident Evil game, call it Code Veronica!" Two years later came one of the scariest Resident Evil games.

The Pros:
While it was doing all of the above, it also lets you upgrade a shotgun to around 1000 damage (amongst numerous other guns), and then blast away blac-sorry, zombie*-people quite a bit. Also, a pro all in itself, Sheva. Another one off the top of my mind, is ALLIGATORZ! Also, THANK YOU CAPCOM FOR MAKING CO-OP!

Sheva: Shh... do you hear alligators?

This game is incredibly addicting, I beat it in 8 and a half hours of gameplay (non-stop, I may add) and I am playing it again on Co-Op with all my guns. Me and other guy's max upg shotties, ATTACK!

Overall S.T.A.R.S. Rating Out Of 10: (c wut i did thar?)
********--
8/10

Good Job Capcom!